a question mark - elliott smith

Where have you been Blake?

Maybe you are wondering about this. I'm not really sure, because i don't know if you are reading this or not. If you are, i apologise for not blogging in so long. I can fill you in over the next few days though, let you know what happened as well as i remember it. At the moment, in case you are wondering, i am sitting in a small restaurant with Peter waiting for some food to arrive while he talks to me about the old secret wars.

Anyway, the day after i last posted, Jared came into my room. I had just started doing some push-ups, and i was determined to break sixty.

He said, 'have you decided, Mr Samuels?'

and i said, '(25) decided on what? (26)'

There was a small pause, and then 'on whether you will join us in our life of waiting for the meteor to arrive. Will you aid us in our cause?'

'(36) i was thinking about it, (37), but it's not really for me Jared, (38), so i guess you'll just have to set me on fire.'

There was another pause, and then 'what exactly are you doing?'

'push-ups. (45). Good for the shoulders.'

'i... i see.'

I stopped at forty nine. I was not impressed with myself. I sat up and looked at Jared looking at me. 'Can i ask a favour?' i asked.

'and what might that be, little one?'

'I was thinking you might let me visit some people in town tonight, you know, to say goodbye and thanks and sorry and whatever else. I'd like to let some people know that i'm in pretty good health before you burn me to cinders.'

Jared shook his head. 'I am sorry, Blake, but we simply cannot allow you to leave this cell. Those who have been shown the path of light and refuse to take it are to be punished for their foolish behaviour. It will be as it has been written, Blake, and you will burn tomorrow, your ashes wandering through the sky until they come to rest with the earth in waiting for the coming of the great meteor.'

I must have looked a bit dejected. I sure felt dejected. Actually, i'm not entirely sure what dejected means anymore. I think it's the word i'm looking for. I just nodded, in any case.

Anyway, Jared leave and say to Trevor, 'your shoulders are looking a little bigger Trevor' A little later Trevor came to my door and said to me, 'are you ok?' and i said 'i think so.'

Then he said, 'can i do anything for you?' and i said, 'maybe tomorrow you could find Celes for me and tell her i'm sorry i missed our date. I think maybe i should have asked you to do it a long time ago but i was really hoping i could do it myself.'

He said, 'i think i can do that for you Blake.'

I sat around thinking for a while that it was a real bummer that i would be getting burnt up before i could even do sixty push-ups.

Outside they were setting up the stake and wood where i would be burnt. I could hear them doing it, and i sometimes saw people passing by my little window carrying wood. Jared told me that they would burn me early in the morning, just before the sun came up. I said i thought that was a good time to do it.

Ooh, sorry, but i have to go now. My burger has arrived and Peter is getting mad that i am not listening to his history lesson ("This is goddamn important boy! You listening? I don't just give this info away you know! I could get in serious trouble for revealing information on the secret wars!"), and also i have to make sure Turbo is ok outside, maybe bring him some water.

I'll post soon though, and update you.

Blake out.